Friday, August 17, 2007

2:53am, IcelandAir Hotel, Reykjavík, Iceland



IcelandAir food. Bleah.

The worst damn airline food I've ever had. The brownie was good, though. Click for notes!

I don’t think I’ve ever had so much trouble getting from airport to hotel. We’d made the plans through Icelandair (via a travel agent) and our itinerary said we’d have a “meet and greet” at the airport. Maybe this is just American presumption, but I thought that “meet and greet” meant there’d be someone holding up a sign with our names on it. Not so much. It meant, rather, that we had to go to the information desk to find out that we had to go to the Iceland Excursions desk to get our vouchers for the bus to Reykjavík.

I think we were flying over Canada here

(Canada?)

Side note: you have to go through security again upon entering Iceland. Curious.

We were feeling a little snippy at this point, but we’d bought two bottles of wine at the post-flight-security Duty Free, so there was at least something to look forward to. Sandwiched between an Icelander chatting with some Canadians and a boorish American boy who would sometimes talk? As if everything was a question? By raising his tone? At the end of his sentences? And coughing liberally and phlegmiously, covering his mouth about 60% of the time. It was about an hour trip, offering plenty of opportunity to plan his untimely demise.

Finally, after a perplexing stop at the bus station, we arrived at the IcelandAir Hotel. Purportedly four star, though… not so much. It’s decent, but not four star by any stretch.

I walked into the room and, leaving the door open a crack, flipped the light switch. Nothing. I flipped it a few more times. Nothing. I walked in farther and flipped the switch on the bedside light. Nothing. There was a hum coming from the tv so I knew there was electricity SOMEwhere, but how? Switch under the tv, no; other lamp, no; hallway light again – yes! But why? And why is pressing the bottom part “off”? (Alternately, why is flipping an American light switch up “on”? Discuss). Either way, more than a little bizarre.

A minute later I realized… there’s no clock in the room. No clock. At all. This pains me. There’s a mini fridge and no clock. There are two q-tips in a tiny baggie, but no clock. A TV with 24-hour porn, and no clock. Remind me again how that was possibly a good idea?

Additionally, while the woman at the AT&T store assured us that our phones should work here the truth is that they don’t. This pains me severely, and not just because I use my phone to tell the time. I checked on the internet status and they do have wireless ($100KR/15mins, $300KR/hour) it’s only on the first floor. I’m on the second. No contact with the outside world. I’m feeling twitchy.

We had some wine and granola bars that my mom had stashed, and chatted away about crappy places we’d stayed before. Dad speculates that this will be a “character building” trip. I’m starting to think he’s right. We’re staying in 3 and 4 star hotels. If this hotel, with its lumpy pillows and bathless bathrooms (AND NO CLOCKS OMGWTF) is the 4-star standard I’m a little concerned about what 3 stars will bring.

Adventure indeed.

Canada...?


P.S. Must find out use for ashtray in "non-smoking" room.
P.P.S. Turns out that TV, while on, displays the time. Also, while on, emits low-level hum designed for absolute misery.
P.P.P.S. In the morning, the phone worked. Why?

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